ow wow...sensual and evocative....love the tactile in the breath and the pulse....mmm..and the wave...that was almost enough to put it over the top...ha...nice
...beautiful cinquain... and i loved the focus you set up with the scented neck... demonstrating the curves from both the inner / outer view... great one.... smiles...
This is really good. Not only have you aced the form and delivered beautiful lines, you've managed to engage all five senses in just 22 syllables. Encore, encore....
A lovely sensuous observation.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Rowan. Nice to meet you.
DeleteVery lovely post...good choice of words that definitely are a moment in time.
ReplyDeleteThank you
Peace
I like the scented neck and the pulsing vein like a wave on water ~ Beautiful cinquain ~
ReplyDeleteow wow...sensual and evocative....love the tactile in the breath and the pulse....mmm..and the wave...that was almost enough to put it over the top...ha...nice
ReplyDeleteLovely small details to notice. Beautiful cinquain!
ReplyDeleteCool poem.
ReplyDeleteThoughts:
"Scented"? Older woman? Maybe I don't know the scenting types.
I was curious why you chose "water". I could almost hear "life". Immersed in life! But it, like "blood" ,only has one damn syllable. Yeah, I get it.
Loved the pic and the dive into flesh.
Sensitive and sensual - loved the 'small wave' so much feeling in so few syllables -K
ReplyDeletePassionate and with so much feeling. Commenting from dVerse.
ReplyDelete...beautiful cinquain... and i loved the focus you set up with the scented neck... demonstrating the curves from both the inner / outer view... great one.... smiles...
ReplyDeletea small wave on warm blue... very nice.
ReplyDeleteThis made me blush a little. You say a lot in those few syllables.
ReplyDeleteA very Japanese sensibility here - the neck, the pulsing vein can be so much more sensuous than anything more obvious.
ReplyDeleteVery nice. This almost perfect switch from the neck to the wave. Masterful
ReplyDeletethis was scary to me... like what was going to happen next... thought loved the gentle pen you used
ReplyDeleteThis is really good. Not only have you aced the form and delivered beautiful lines, you've managed to engage all five senses in just 22 syllables. Encore, encore....
ReplyDeleteAhh, sensuous.
ReplyDeleteYou've outdone yourself...this is tender and perfect..
ReplyDeleteoh really love the comparison of the pulsing vein with a wave on blue warm water..so cool
ReplyDeleteYet another powerful poem sir...
ReplyDelete