Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Something Follows Me

I try to outrun it,
pacing into the tall grass of the fields
where the under-creatures scurry and
chattering insects leap from harvest heads,
even wading hip high under oozing nightness
absent any human companion,

something follows me
and I sooo want to turn and face it -

again,

for though I struggle,
I've built immunity
and want to exercise my
peculiar muscles,
make the adrenaline flow
against this troubled foe,
toe to toe.

It always chases me
because I carry it with me
wherever I go,
                    portable,
I make it so,
I want it so,
attached to me,
this fault in my pocket
that follows free,

my mishapen character,
a pattern in my mind will
distill into the reality
I need to see,
recognize it clearly,
an image burned
in my surroundings manifest,

so comfortable
that my psyche dances through,
knowing that
my coping skills
can thrive,
feel alive,
clash blades,
against this thing
that follows me.


©Eusebeia Philos 2013

9 comments:

  1. I would love to hear this poem read out loud. Lovely!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Funny you say that, Emmett. On this poem I kept speaking it back to myself because it had that type of feel. Thanks.

      Delete
  2. you know i had this chase dream once...through the woods at night...and finally the person caught me and as the moonlight caught their face, just before plunging the knife...i saw it was myself....that is where your poem took me today...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Brian, you have some crazy dreams too! Must be some meaning in that. In my dreams, I always stop running and turn to face whatever it is that chases me. I refuse to be caught from behind.

      Delete
  3. So true that sometimes one's faults follow one no matter how hard one tries to break free! You've captured something here in your poem.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I had a dream I was riding a tiger through the forest and someone was chasing me..and just before I woke up I saw who it was..it was a warning of a betrayal..in the dreamworld you should always try and face the threat then it will have less power..jmo..

    ReplyDelete
  5. That was like the ride through the tunnel in the Willie Wonka movie--Fabulous!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Tyger tyger burning bright... that image came to mind. But when you turn around to face it, it's not there!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I got the feeling as Mary did..the chaser was your own imperfections..mistakes..'thorn in the flesh..following you wherever you go..hence the desire to face and conquer..good write

    ReplyDelete